Boxes

By Victoria Edwards


I remember when boxes were symbols of claustrophobia
They wrapped their walls around barriers that obstructed
Only views you built up
I remember when concrete hurt harder than heartbreak
And conversation was the drug we injected into
Our ears, our hands, and our lips
Planting seeds of infatuation we confused for love
Yet lust was the butter churning in our barrels of lies
And deceit
And that's when the box became the symbol of treasure
In which neither of us had found in one another
Only within ourselves
As if we were in bondage of the mind and it was of no fault but
Mine
I remember the ballot in the box the day I elected
To listen to the buffoonery that I let plug my ears for so damn long
Most importantly I remember the vow I made to myself to never
Change for you
I changed the things externally because surfaces can be cleaned
But I never went into the pantry of my heart and cleared the boxes
You packed so tightly in there
Yet I am so open
And you are so closed up
You are afraid of the barrier you made me
The gate you built so that I could keep hate out
So when you decide to despise me
It only shuts you out
Puts you down
And brings us randomly into the never ending square pattern
Of dancing in the corners of boxes we built for one another
Through the gates of time
We once walked through
It may seem as though you will never truly understand this
But it will all make sense
When you have found your treasure lodged in the box of someone
Else's handiwork
And you will become familiar with the scent
Of a perfume you never can erase
The aroma of a coffee that contains no caffeine
Because it was boxed by the manufactured shipment
Of your hate, distrust, and disloyalty
Me.