I promise to do good

By Ivy Collins Poitras


I promise to do good in my life
for the reason (nay, revenge)
that when it should end,
I shall refuse the mechanical offer set to me
by Saint Peter.
I shall do good
and deserve good
deserve Heaven
yet speak a resounding "No,"
as I turn to look to Lucifer's door,
with a glint in my eye
I put there,
when my name is called from those Gates
I am to want.

I shall cause sharp uproar
imbalance so great it shakes the earth of clouds
for I will have done good
and yet ask to rest in Hell.
O! Such insult I shall ask.
All for reason (nay, revenge)
I have planned, and will have spent my life planning.
I shall bear my cross into Hell
for the angels cannot thieve it from my neck.

Why, you ask?
Why turn from Heaven?
Why ask for damnation?
In truth, I do not.
I threaten.
It shall be the only bad I shall do
in my good life.

There is a balance, I trust
and it is a gamble
but God cares not about gambling
but about balance, I am sure He does.
I shall have my name called,
and walk up until my toes are just
almost
nearly
touching the threshold,
and then I shall refuse God
calmly.

I shall do good in my life
until the day I infuriate God.
He shall hear me, for He hears all,
and storm to the Gates
to me
lauding order of afterlife.
Not a clean soul, cast down to Hell!
Surely even Lucifer,
a soul of good,
deserves Hell more than I!
He
the great He
shall ask me
as you do,
"Why?"
in the roar of a caged lion.

For I will have done good, and yet
pluck the harp strings of my agency
and say naught but no.
I shall do good in my life
for the reason (nay, revenge)
that when it should end,
And I refuse the balance,
The order,
And Heaven itself, 
God, in desperation,
restoration of balance his only Savior,
will finally
rightly
as I deserve him to
beg for my forgiveness.